I will reblog this everyday
anytime a guy says “that’s what she said” always reply with “not to you”
#FridayFun time! Now here’s an innovation the world is ready for: The Cuddle Mattress, which introduces slats to the upper half of the bed, making it easier to slip your arm around your partner and still sleep in comfort. http://www.npr.org/blogs/alltechconsidered/2013/08/27/216091675/weekly-innovation-a-mattress-that-makes-it-easier-to-cuddle
this is it.
THIS IS FUCKING IT.
AFTER ALL THESE YEARS OF ARMS FALLING ASLEEP AND ACHING NECKS WE’VE FINALLY ARRIVED
THERE IS NO MORE WORRYING NOW THAT WE HAVE THESE FOAM STRIPS TO SHOVE OUR GRUBBY LITTLE ARMS INTO. JUST THINK OF THE OPPORTUNITIES. MAYBE SOME KID CAN FILL A PLASTIC BAG WITH LUBE, TUCK IT BETWEEN THIS SHIT, AND JUST GO TO FUCKING TOWN ON THIS STATE-OF-THE-ART MATTRESS
BUT THATS NOT ALL. DO YOUR FUCKING TOES GET COLD? SHOVE YOUR FEET IN THESE CUSHIONS AND SLEEP SOUNDLY KNOWING YOUR FOOT-NUBS ARE FREE OF THE COLD.
NEED TO KEEP YOUR PHONE CLOSER WHILE YOU SLEEP? TOSS IT IN THE CRACK. AFRAID TO LEAVE YOUR CHILD ALONE IN THEIR NURSERY? WEDGE IT INTO THE CRACK. JUST FUCKING DO IT. EVER TEMPTED TO SIP A BEVERAGE WITHOUT GETTING OUT OF BED? SHOVE A CUP AND THERE AND INSERT YOUR STRAW. PRESTO-CHANGO, MOTHERFUCKERS.
WHY IS NO ONE TALKING ABOUT THIS. THIS BED CAN SOLVE ALL OF THE PROBLEMS IN THE WORLD. GO OUT THERE AND BUY YOUR CUDDLING, MASTURBATORY, CHILD-AND-DRINK-HOLDING, PHONE-STORING MATTRESS RIGHT NOW OR I SWEAR TO GODTumblr users should never make infomercialsxcuse yew
The Jewel by Amy Ewing
9. Favorite lady friendship
→ Celaena Sardothien & Nehemia Ytger
"I name you Elentiya." She kissed the assassin’s brow. "I give you this name to use with honor, to use when other names grow too heavy. I name you Elentiya, ‘Spirit That Could Not Be Broken.’"
Celaena was held in place. She could feel the name fall upon her like a shimmering veil. This was unconditional love. Friends like this did not exist. Why was she so fortunate as to have found one?
R.I.P. The 2976 American people that lost their lives on 9/11 and R.I.P. the 48,644 Afghan and 1,690,903 Iraqi and 35000 Pakistani people that paid the ultimate price for a crime they did not commit.
the fucking worst is when people are like “you hate people for having a different opinion than you!!!!” like im not shitting on this guy because he thinks pistachio ice cream is gross im shitting on him because he actually believes that i and people like me dont deserve basic human rights and respect and safety
I like books that ruin me.
I don’t want some feel good shit.
I want it to haunt me for the rest of my life, I want to think of a line randomly and just feel my insides churn because of the emotions it made me feel.
That should be any authors goal.
To inflict such intense emotions that the reader has no other choice but hear the echos of their own voice reading the words you wrote on the page.
That is why I love reading.
Homosexuality is unnatural! It says so in this book where snakes talk, people come back from the dead, a guy walks on water, and a virgin has a baby.
"America is a land of freedom!!11!!"
It literally kills me when men think they know women’s fashion better than women
- i am angry because this is just another example of women being shamed for taking nudes instead of the douchebag who spreads them being shamed for violating someone’s privacy like that
- i am angry because nobody deserves this, regardless of how i feel about their personality
- i am angry because this is pure misogyny and shows how women aren’t respected in our culture
- i am angry because she did not consent to having those pics posted everywhere but they still were
- i am angry because on the VERY RARE occasion this happens to a male celeb he is not shamed but rather the perpetrator is and it’s forgotten quickly whereas this will haunt jennifer for years and years to come
- i am angry because this was a sex crime and people are treating it like a joke
- i am angry because she is being exploited/objectified and some gross dudebros are probably jacking off to those pics
- i am angry because people are CONGRATULATING the fucker who did such an atrocious thing to her instead of being appalled
listen i may not like her personally but the fact remains that as a human being she is entitled to body autonomy and to choose who sees her naked body and who doesn’t